Substantial Crush
My kiddo has had a crush on the same girl since 2nd grade. On the first day he saw her, his smile lit up his face and he instantly began chatting her head off. She was shy and was unsure about her new school and he made it his mission to befriend her and give her a great first year.
In third grade, (I'll never forget this) I was rushing him out the door for school. He was dawdling ... like he always does ... and his face transformed from everyday kid to a starstruck dreamer. He smiled and stared out to nothing at all and said, "You know mommy ... I'm going to marry that girl someday and carry her over the threshold in her wedding dress. I even know who my best men are going to be." I blinked twice unsure of how to answer, told him that he was very sweet, and continued rushing him out the door for school.
In fourth grade, he wanted to start buying her gifts for birthdays, Christmas, or practically any other reason he could think of. We'd arrange meet-ups with her parents after school, at a nearby restaurant, so they could sit at their own table to exchange gifts. This way no one at school saw it because by now boys were making fun of others when they liked girls, who were still supposed to be gross.
In fifth grade, he came home and told me that he'd asked her to dinner and excitedly exclaimed that she said 'Yes!'. I again blinked, because I wondered just how he was going to pay to take her out to dinner or drive her there - and joked about it. I asked him just when were they going and where to which he replied ... 'I'd like to take her somewhere expensive and it's this Friday night'.
At this point - we had a talk about clearing things through me first as I already had plans that night. We also discussed my budget, as I couldn't afford to buy the two of them an expensive dinner. Then we talked about age-appropriate dating ... and that when he was old enough to drive and pay for her dinner ... then he could take her on a date if her parents agreed. Needless to say, I took them to an early afternoon snack at a local drive-in, so he could fulfill his promise to her and take her to dinner.
This year, he doesn't talk about her much, because he's in sixth grade ... and hey, he's a dude. Guys don't talk about girls ... but every once in a while he'll bring her up with me and clue me in on what they talked about that day. I get a glimpse of his heart and it makes me smile.
Last week, we had a sweet conversation that went a little like this:
In third grade, (I'll never forget this) I was rushing him out the door for school. He was dawdling ... like he always does ... and his face transformed from everyday kid to a starstruck dreamer. He smiled and stared out to nothing at all and said, "You know mommy ... I'm going to marry that girl someday and carry her over the threshold in her wedding dress. I even know who my best men are going to be." I blinked twice unsure of how to answer, told him that he was very sweet, and continued rushing him out the door for school.
In fourth grade, he wanted to start buying her gifts for birthdays, Christmas, or practically any other reason he could think of. We'd arrange meet-ups with her parents after school, at a nearby restaurant, so they could sit at their own table to exchange gifts. This way no one at school saw it because by now boys were making fun of others when they liked girls, who were still supposed to be gross.
In fifth grade, he came home and told me that he'd asked her to dinner and excitedly exclaimed that she said 'Yes!'. I again blinked, because I wondered just how he was going to pay to take her out to dinner or drive her there - and joked about it. I asked him just when were they going and where to which he replied ... 'I'd like to take her somewhere expensive and it's this Friday night'.
At this point - we had a talk about clearing things through me first as I already had plans that night. We also discussed my budget, as I couldn't afford to buy the two of them an expensive dinner. Then we talked about age-appropriate dating ... and that when he was old enough to drive and pay for her dinner ... then he could take her on a date if her parents agreed. Needless to say, I took them to an early afternoon snack at a local drive-in, so he could fulfill his promise to her and take her to dinner.
This year, he doesn't talk about her much, because he's in sixth grade ... and hey, he's a dude. Guys don't talk about girls ... but every once in a while he'll bring her up with me and clue me in on what they talked about that day. I get a glimpse of his heart and it makes me smile.
Last week, we had a sweet conversation that went a little like this:
T: "I think I want to get (insert any girl's name) a Christmas gift."
Me: "What do you think she'd like?"
T: "um, I don't know..." (he thought for a few seconds) "you know we can just get her something sparkly. Girls like that kind of stuff." (He thinks some more) "no, forget that ... She's much more substantial than that. I'll have to put some thought into it."
It blows me away that he is so invested at such a young age. He's so tender-hearted, and obviously very thoughtful. I don't know if he'll grow out of his crush with this young girl, who is equally as sweet by the way. But what I do know is that he is going to make a great husband one day. And I pray for his wife, that she'll love his tender heart, appreciate his loyal spirit, and give back 110% to him what he gives to her.
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